Part 1
Here we were in 1990, so shiny and young,
over thirty years ago,
married for seven years,
growing our family.
Each day was so busy
in fact, life was completely
full to the brim
while we juggled
all the multitude
of goodness and challenges.
In rare quiet moments,
while I folded mountains
of laundry or washed dishes,
in the midst of all the activity,
in my heart I heard
a deeper kind of river
calling out to me.
I was longing for a Slow Way
to know these people,
a deliberate setting
where we could all learn
how to really listen
and connect with each other.
Though we both had grown up
in an era when talking
about our feelings,
even the good ones…
where narrating the flowing waters
beneath the surface of life
was regarded as dangerous
and best kept off limits…
I was yearning to step beyond
that cultural caution tape
and I convinced this dear man
to move further into the multi-layered
territory of heart with me.
We set out to create a place
for our young family
to share, out loud,
the things we all carry inside
but seldom get the chance to speak.
Since this process was new,
even a bit daring and risky,
we began with
speaking appreciation…
after all, how could saying
“Thank You”
hurt anybody?!
That first brave step
was the beginning
of solstice.
Part 2
Here we are in 2017,
more than a bit older,
maybe even somewhat wiser
and looking back
at those first years…
While we all learned how to
move into uncharted waters,
saying out loud,
in front of each other
Thank you for…
I love you because…
I’m proud of you for…
I want to tell you…
there were no shortcuts
in this deliberate process
of articulating the details
of our feelings,
we just
kept returning every year
on the Longest Night to practice.
You know, though Tim and I
were beginners, I think we still
imagined, as parents, that we were
“leading” solstice for our kids.
But gradually it became crystal clear…
the tender, spoken aspects of heart
contributed by every single one of us
carried the very same fundamental
weight and importance.
We discovered that we were not
just a circle of parents and children,
speaking from different layers of maturity
instead, we are equal peers in brave communication…
articulating gratitude and reconciliation,
offering validation and intentional support.
Each of us has a precious, essential voice
necessary for nourishing the health
of our relationships.
Now from this most basic understanding
an even greater truth is emerging…
while initially it seemed
we were creating this circle
instead we are aware
that it is the vast, potent potential
of this special place called solstice
that simply,
has been always,
Leading Us.
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